The NBA season is finally underway and th-zZzzZzzZzzZzzZzzZzzzzzzz…..

All of the so called “experts” with all of their sources have him listed as “probable” for his match-up against the Vikings.

Never mind them. Aaron Rodgers will play in the game hes been waiting his whole life to play in.

The NSI is confirming that Sanchy was simply hungry.

We’re also reporting that anyone in the media that is bitching about this is a gas bag…no pun intended of course.

We all know he’s NOT here to discuss the past, but lets talk about his future…
…and that future, NSI confirms, has McGwire as Cardinals Manager within the next 3 seasons.

-NSI

NSI reports that it hurt. A lot.

Here’s a direct quote from Leon, “Ouch”.

Stay tuned for more.

-NSI

Early HOF predicitions started with my report earlier this month that Desean Jackson would make the HOF after only seeing him play in one game. BTW, notice what hes doing on MNF. About to update him to first ballot HOF’er. Here’s some more:

Miles Austin will make the HOF.

Shonn Greene will too.

Let’s take a flyer on Alex Smith….I say 2 pro bowls before he’s done.

-NSI

Earlier this year, Adam Schefter, or Scheffy as I like to call him, reported that the Minnesota Vikings had a schism in their locker room.

The NSI is now reporting with 100% certainty that the Redskins have an earthquake in theirs.

In other Redskins news, Jim Zorn has lost the locker room.

-NSI

Q: Since you’ve got your NBA news up and going, will Yao play in the NBA ever again, if so, will he re-sign with the Rockets next summer or look elsewhere?
-Ari

NSI: Yao will play again, but will not sign with Houston next season as the Rockets will look to go in a different direction. Tough when your top two players, T-Mac and Yao, are always hurt. They need to start over.

Q: Im trying to be the best fake GM the world has ever seen. I consider myself the Bill Parcels of fantasy.  However, I am truly torn on this one. Should I trade Thomas Jones (especially after last week’s great game) and Brent Celek for Dallas Clark? I sort of see Jones getting a lot more burn in the coming weeks due to the Dirty Sanchez’s struggles but Clark is just straight money. O what to do?
-Eric

NSI: No need to stress, Eric, the NSI is here for you. Celek has been good enough and you get Jones back. Do that deal now.

Q: McNabb’s contract is coming up, will he be re-signed? If not, will Mike Vick be the Eagles everyday starter.
-Aaron

NSI: McNabb stays, Vick leaves. Kolb takes over in 2-3 years.

Q: NSI, you gotta help me. I’m writing you from the future. I lost my sports almanac and have no idea who will win the 2012 Super Bowl. C’mon man, I need this. Without my almanac I’m as dumb as a dolphin. Don’t make me send younger me to hurt you. Wait, if younger me is me then am I younger me? Am I not me? Who is me…..
-Biff The Bully

NSI: Future-me says in 2012, when I am 40, the NY Giants will win the Super Bowl.

Q: Which of the following 4 players do you foresee becoming the next great NFL Hall of Famer: Jake Locker,  Jevon Snead,  Colt McCoy, or Sam Bradford?

NSI: Locker. He’s a lock.

Have a question for the NSI? Click here and fire away.

No, not the Patriots. The Steelers.

Roethlisberger is playing the best football of his career and Polamalu comes back this week.

Best team in football.

The NSI knows things, that’s how this works.

With that, I present to you the 2009-2010 NBA Season.

Division Winners:
Atlantic – Boston
Central – Cleveland
Southeast – Orlando
Northwest – Denver
Pacific – La Lakers
Southwest – San Antonio

East Conf Finals:
Cleveland over Orlando in 6

West Conf Finals:
LA Lakers over San Antonio in 7

**The only reason one of those four teams wont be there is because Denver or Boston might beat one of them. But NO other team in the NBA has a shot at being in that final four.

NBA Finals:
Cleveland in 7. Shaq hands Lebron the Finals MVP Trophy because he’s insecure and makes post games comments that aren’t funny, yet the reporters laugh.

First Team All NBA:
PG – Chris Paul
SG – Dwayne Wade
SF – Lebron James
SF – Kobe Bryant
C – Dwight Howard
MVP – Lebron James
Coach of the Year – The one that gets to coach Lebron or the one that gets to coach Kobe.

First Superstar to get hurt – T-Mac
Second – Vince Carter

Others to get hurt:
Greg Oden
Baron Davis
Kenyon Martin
Not sure about Carlos Boozer yet.
Michael Redd
Peja

*Stay tuned to this list as it is constantly changing as we get to the season and during the season. Sometime you can see injuries coming and Ill explain how when the season arrives.

Superstar who will say he is hurt but just likes taking nights off –  Shaq

Best  player uggliest game award – Shawn Marion

Player that always looks tired – Paul Pierce

*Still have 5 days until the season starts, check back for more.